Yup...yup...yup...my final is just around the corner, the 1st one will be on 30th April, 07 this Monday at 2.15pm...d second one on the 2nd May, the third one wl be on 4th May and the last one will be on 13th May, 07...
I had just recover from fever, start up with a flu, then sore throat n then the fever come along...complete in a package...The Dr. told me I have a big ulser down there on my throat, no wonder sakit kalo minum air n makan, dah lah kalo tak sakit pun maleh belajar ni plak kalo sakit...huhuuuu...GOD, Help Me!!!!! please let the penyakit 'Malas' ni pergi jauh dr aku... skrg ni semenjak ada Syasya aku mmg maleh sangat nak study...sonok dok main n give my attention to her...i usually sit infront of the TV watching channel 63 and sing along with her...may be I'm more excited than her when I watch Barney, Johnny and the Sprites tuuuu...mmg best melayan Syasya tgk cartoon while she's nodding her head n shake her body...best sgt lah!!!
I admit it has been about 4 years +++ that I have involved in part time studying... I experienced a lot of ups and downs...I am among the youngest n I am among the one yg selalu dpt average mark jek..coz mmg 'pemalas'...I love English...but I don't fancy technical subject like structure of english-syntax, phonetics and phonology...the study of how sound is produced...that's why I end up failing in those subjects!!! hahahaha dah membuka pekung di dada!!! that's why I'm not that good in my 'grammar' like to use what I felt like is right rather than sticking to the rules! boring stuff ...but what to do, I chose this 'TESL' thing, but guess what? I scored magnificently in my Literature subject, why coz I love literature, dulu kat sekolah pun amik Sastera...belief that Art is something that is full with passion..bla bla bla...tu la but in life sometimes we can't choose...we have to do things that we don't like...sigh!
Last semester was a very 'MEMORABLE SEMESTER', I was expecting my darling Angel ..at that point of time I went to class almost everyday after work from cyberjaya with my lil' orange kancil, dah la masa tu pakai keta manual...tiap2 hari turun naik tangga kelas...pastu sibuk ngan acting coz last year ada DRAMA...funny when I remind myself acting with that big fat tummy,dah la bulan poser, I managed to fast the whole month, heheheheh! dah la masa tu critical coz don't know when is the exact date for delivery...but with GOD's will sempat took part in the DRAMA, bukan apa marks for the acting masuk for carry mark. After that I manage to sit for one paper, then ada lagi 2 paper literature blom amik, disebabkan I am 1 week overdue, kena plak induce...was admitted n masa tu risau sgt, kalo tak paksa takut tgh peksa nak besalin...end up study kat hospital, masa tu tension gak coz thought that my hubby can accompany me at the hospital since I took a single bed room...tgk Anne elok jek dorang bagi Senul temankan...kena plak my time dpt la nurse 'skima', so mlm tu tido la sengsorang betemankan buku2 literature, masa tu the novel that I have to read was 'SONS and LOVERS by D.H.Lawrence' emm a very heavy novel for somebody who's going to deliver..huhuuu....mmg masa tu tak masuk pun apa yg dibaca...
Masa bersalinkan Syasya...yg sedihnya dahla I don't want to take epidural coz mmg tau the cons of taking it...mmg cuba sedaya upaya nak normal delivery...Yes! berjaya walopun rasa sakit yg amat!lucky hubby was there all along...he was there dari awal sampai akhir, he maintained calm even when he got to see the baby's head...if it was me musti dah pengsan...ehhehe...thanks sayang...disebabkan Syasya gak, Papa missed taking one of his exam...at first mmg ingat Papa sempat coz Mama dah masuk labor room pagi tu, tp rupe2nya tak smpt, n my Mom kat luar dah bersedia nak gantikan tmpt my hubby to give me support, tp Mak kat luar heran naper la hubby tak kuar2 lagik, ruper2nya hubby decided to stay...Hubby called his lecturer n informed that his beloved wife is now between life and death n in the midst of delivering our baby...the lecturer being a woman understands n informed that hubby must bring a letter from hospital...thanks abang..dlm kol 239pm akhirnya berjaya melahirkan Syasya...tp lepas tu the Dr. said there's a complication...what? both of us were shocked? what happened to our baby Doc? is there anything wrong with her? No, it's not her but your wife, Me? I don't care anymore as long as my baby is ok...lantaklah nak buat apa pun ngan aku, aku dah tak kisah...
Actually masa dorang cuba kuarkan uri tu...ada serpihan uri yg lekat n tak boleh dikeluarkan secara manual...dah byk nurse cuba tp tak berjaya...the last resort is, masuk operation teater, cucuk spinal n buat placenta removal...ala2 cuci 'd and c' tu...I have tu sign a letter of approval to do that...masa tanya Dr. kalo tak buat tak pe ke? dia kata tak boleh tak buat coz boleh mati coz tumpah darah...so nak tak nak buat lah...berejam2 dlm operation teater tu...i got the choice to watch the process but I refused...I rather closed my eyes n let them do their job...pas semua tu berlalu dpt la balik ke bilik petang tu...dpt pegang syasya n breastfeed her...biasalah kat government, they won't let you bottlefeed yr baby...n alhamdulillah I managed to BF Syasya eventhough I'm still weak..thank u so much to my mom n hubby yang sabar n memberi sokongan...
Selepas 2 mlm kot kat hospital pastu boleh balik, cabaran baru bermula, kena pi amik exam selepas 2hari bersalin, mmg pening la masa jawab atas katil kat pusat kesihatan UiTM, masa tu Syasya dok dlm bakul baby, my mom tunggu kat luar n nurse2 kat situ sibuk usung Syasya kehulu kehilir...masa tu my mom dibenarkan urut2 bahu n my hubby kejap2 dtg picit kepala...dlm 3 jam jawab peksa, satu jam bole tido...2 jam jawab soalan essay literature tu...belasah jek...masa tu my mom pun kira sporting coz dlm masa yg sama dia risau gak coz org kata dlm pantang tak bole stress, takut meroyan,tp mmg masa jawab exam tu mmg susah sgt nak kuarkan isi...just write what was at my head tak pikir in depth pun...masa paper ke 2, my mom in law yg jagakan Syasya kat umah, Papa bwk Mama pi klinik kesihatan lagik, dgn kain batik, bengkung n kepala yg berdenyut2, masa tu mmg muntah2 teruk, coz dorang kata effect ubat bius yg kat spinal masa cuci uri yg tersekat aritu, mak ai mmg menguji betul...tak tau la bentan ke tak tp mmg abihkan jugak exam tu...rasanya mmg pengalaman belajar ni byk mengajar aku yg lembik ni supaya be strong and stretch myself to the limit...nothing is impossible...i wish I am that strong now, coz sem ni cam dah ilang fokus n dah ilang semangat nak teruskan sisa-sisa perjuangan ini...dah tak sabar sgt abihkan semua nih.
Kesimpulannnya, masa belajar, Syasya dlm perut Mama lagi senang coz u'r near me, near to my heart where I can hear you...skrg ni bila Syasya dah ada kat luar, Mama lebih teruja dekat ngan Syasya dari dekat ngan buku2 ni...May be dah sampai satu tahap dah bosan giler ngan study nie...dah 4 tahun dah...skrg ni kena kuatkan hati coz kalo kantoi subject ni abihla sia2 jek pengorbanan 4 thn ni...this is my last chance, kalo lepas 4 paper ni, next sem akan tinggal thesis, practicum n post practicum jek....
Dear Friends, please pray for me...semoga aku lulus kali ni dlm subject2 repeat yg aku simpan utk semester nie...walopun aku mmg tak suker ngan subject2 ni tp nak buat camne kan...bukakan pintu hati ku utk menerima ilmu ni dan jauhkan aku dr sifat malas yg menguasai diri...Amin!
For Beloved Hubby, "Good Luck to You Too!ni last paper Papa, pas ni dah tak yah pi kelas dah...I know you can do it!!!, Chai Yok!..
To Syasya Darling, "Happy Belated 1st Birthday!, semoga menjadi anak yang baik,yang solehah dan yang tak lupa pada orang tua yer sayang!"nanti pas Mama exam kita celebrate birthday sayang yer.....Love, Mama.
I had just recover from fever, start up with a flu, then sore throat n then the fever come along...complete in a package...The Dr. told me I have a big ulser down there on my throat, no wonder sakit kalo minum air n makan, dah lah kalo tak sakit pun maleh belajar ni plak kalo sakit...huhuuuu...GOD, Help Me!!!!! please let the penyakit 'Malas' ni pergi jauh dr aku... skrg ni semenjak ada Syasya aku mmg maleh sangat nak study...sonok dok main n give my attention to her...i usually sit infront of the TV watching channel 63 and sing along with her...may be I'm more excited than her when I watch Barney, Johnny and the Sprites tuuuu...mmg best melayan Syasya tgk cartoon while she's nodding her head n shake her body...best sgt lah!!!
I admit it has been about 4 years +++ that I have involved in part time studying... I experienced a lot of ups and downs...I am among the youngest n I am among the one yg selalu dpt average mark jek..coz mmg 'pemalas'...I love English...but I don't fancy technical subject like structure of english-syntax, phonetics and phonology...the study of how sound is produced...that's why I end up failing in those subjects!!! hahahaha dah membuka pekung di dada!!! that's why I'm not that good in my 'grammar' like to use what I felt like is right rather than sticking to the rules! boring stuff ...but what to do, I chose this 'TESL' thing, but guess what? I scored magnificently in my Literature subject, why coz I love literature, dulu kat sekolah pun amik Sastera...belief that Art is something that is full with passion..bla bla bla...tu la but in life sometimes we can't choose...we have to do things that we don't like...sigh!
Last semester was a very 'MEMORABLE SEMESTER', I was expecting my darling Angel ..at that point of time I went to class almost everyday after work from cyberjaya with my lil' orange kancil, dah la masa tu pakai keta manual...tiap2 hari turun naik tangga kelas...pastu sibuk ngan acting coz last year ada DRAMA...funny when I remind myself acting with that big fat tummy,dah la bulan poser, I managed to fast the whole month, heheheheh! dah la masa tu critical coz don't know when is the exact date for delivery...but with GOD's will sempat took part in the DRAMA, bukan apa marks for the acting masuk for carry mark. After that I manage to sit for one paper, then ada lagi 2 paper literature blom amik, disebabkan I am 1 week overdue, kena plak induce...was admitted n masa tu risau sgt, kalo tak paksa takut tgh peksa nak besalin...end up study kat hospital, masa tu tension gak coz thought that my hubby can accompany me at the hospital since I took a single bed room...tgk Anne elok jek dorang bagi Senul temankan...kena plak my time dpt la nurse 'skima', so mlm tu tido la sengsorang betemankan buku2 literature, masa tu the novel that I have to read was 'SONS and LOVERS by D.H.Lawrence' emm a very heavy novel for somebody who's going to deliver..huhuuu....mmg masa tu tak masuk pun apa yg dibaca...
Masa bersalinkan Syasya...yg sedihnya dahla I don't want to take epidural coz mmg tau the cons of taking it...mmg cuba sedaya upaya nak normal delivery...Yes! berjaya walopun rasa sakit yg amat!lucky hubby was there all along...he was there dari awal sampai akhir, he maintained calm even when he got to see the baby's head...if it was me musti dah pengsan...ehhehe...thanks sayang...disebabkan Syasya gak, Papa missed taking one of his exam...at first mmg ingat Papa sempat coz Mama dah masuk labor room pagi tu, tp rupe2nya tak smpt, n my Mom kat luar dah bersedia nak gantikan tmpt my hubby to give me support, tp Mak kat luar heran naper la hubby tak kuar2 lagik, ruper2nya hubby decided to stay...Hubby called his lecturer n informed that his beloved wife is now between life and death n in the midst of delivering our baby...the lecturer being a woman understands n informed that hubby must bring a letter from hospital...thanks abang..dlm kol 239pm akhirnya berjaya melahirkan Syasya...tp lepas tu the Dr. said there's a complication...what? both of us were shocked? what happened to our baby Doc? is there anything wrong with her? No, it's not her but your wife, Me? I don't care anymore as long as my baby is ok...lantaklah nak buat apa pun ngan aku, aku dah tak kisah...
Actually masa dorang cuba kuarkan uri tu...ada serpihan uri yg lekat n tak boleh dikeluarkan secara manual...dah byk nurse cuba tp tak berjaya...the last resort is, masuk operation teater, cucuk spinal n buat placenta removal...ala2 cuci 'd and c' tu...I have tu sign a letter of approval to do that...masa tanya Dr. kalo tak buat tak pe ke? dia kata tak boleh tak buat coz boleh mati coz tumpah darah...so nak tak nak buat lah...berejam2 dlm operation teater tu...i got the choice to watch the process but I refused...I rather closed my eyes n let them do their job...pas semua tu berlalu dpt la balik ke bilik petang tu...dpt pegang syasya n breastfeed her...biasalah kat government, they won't let you bottlefeed yr baby...n alhamdulillah I managed to BF Syasya eventhough I'm still weak..thank u so much to my mom n hubby yang sabar n memberi sokongan...
Selepas 2 mlm kot kat hospital pastu boleh balik, cabaran baru bermula, kena pi amik exam selepas 2hari bersalin, mmg pening la masa jawab atas katil kat pusat kesihatan UiTM, masa tu Syasya dok dlm bakul baby, my mom tunggu kat luar n nurse2 kat situ sibuk usung Syasya kehulu kehilir...masa tu my mom dibenarkan urut2 bahu n my hubby kejap2 dtg picit kepala...dlm 3 jam jawab peksa, satu jam bole tido...2 jam jawab soalan essay literature tu...belasah jek...masa tu my mom pun kira sporting coz dlm masa yg sama dia risau gak coz org kata dlm pantang tak bole stress, takut meroyan,tp mmg masa jawab exam tu mmg susah sgt nak kuarkan isi...just write what was at my head tak pikir in depth pun...masa paper ke 2, my mom in law yg jagakan Syasya kat umah, Papa bwk Mama pi klinik kesihatan lagik, dgn kain batik, bengkung n kepala yg berdenyut2, masa tu mmg muntah2 teruk, coz dorang kata effect ubat bius yg kat spinal masa cuci uri yg tersekat aritu, mak ai mmg menguji betul...tak tau la bentan ke tak tp mmg abihkan jugak exam tu...rasanya mmg pengalaman belajar ni byk mengajar aku yg lembik ni supaya be strong and stretch myself to the limit...nothing is impossible...i wish I am that strong now, coz sem ni cam dah ilang fokus n dah ilang semangat nak teruskan sisa-sisa perjuangan ini...dah tak sabar sgt abihkan semua nih.
Kesimpulannnya, masa belajar, Syasya dlm perut Mama lagi senang coz u'r near me, near to my heart where I can hear you...skrg ni bila Syasya dah ada kat luar, Mama lebih teruja dekat ngan Syasya dari dekat ngan buku2 ni...May be dah sampai satu tahap dah bosan giler ngan study nie...dah 4 tahun dah...skrg ni kena kuatkan hati coz kalo kantoi subject ni abihla sia2 jek pengorbanan 4 thn ni...this is my last chance, kalo lepas 4 paper ni, next sem akan tinggal thesis, practicum n post practicum jek....
Dear Friends, please pray for me...semoga aku lulus kali ni dlm subject2 repeat yg aku simpan utk semester nie...walopun aku mmg tak suker ngan subject2 ni tp nak buat camne kan...bukakan pintu hati ku utk menerima ilmu ni dan jauhkan aku dr sifat malas yg menguasai diri...Amin!
For Beloved Hubby, "Good Luck to You Too!ni last paper Papa, pas ni dah tak yah pi kelas dah...I know you can do it!!!, Chai Yok!..
To Syasya Darling, "Happy Belated 1st Birthday!, semoga menjadi anak yang baik,yang solehah dan yang tak lupa pada orang tua yer sayang!"nanti pas Mama exam kita celebrate birthday sayang yer.....Love, Mama.
8 comments:
mai, being a working mother and at the same time as student wasnt easy task. especially when u have to seat exam after deliver 2 days! omg how strong u are mai. dan semestinya itu satu pengalaman yg x mungkin dilupakan, tgh exam boleh tido kejap...boleh ada org urut-urut. mesti berbaloi degree yg mai dapat ni. i've just finish my very 1st semester exam. tatau la what's the outcome since its my 1st exam after 5 yrs resting! anna doakan mai berjaya dengan warna-warna terbang in ur final exam ni ya.
btw, kat government hospital boleh amik epidural ek? sbb as far as i know, mmg derang tak kasik amik unless c-sect. and all -ve story bout epidural is only a myth! u shud read an article published in mingguan malaysia previous weeks ago regarding this epidural thing! trust me, if i ever get pregnant, definately i will go 4r epidural again. tak sanggup!
hepi bday baby syasya!!!
anna: mai tak amik epidural, mmg go for natural process, tp lepas dah syasya dah kuar semua tu, kena buat placenta removal yg procedure dia sama lebih kurang cam epidural...bius half body so kena cucuk kat spinal, tp kesan dia sama cam epidural...so buat penat jek tahan sakit masa deliver tu...hehehe...mai bersalin kat govt-putrajaya hosp, sbb tu mai n hubby study lagi coz non exec company tak cover pi private. Lgpun time tu duit nak simpan nak amik maid kan, itu pun dah cam byr sama bersalin operation kat private...huhuuu...tepaksa sacrifice sikit...alhamdulillah syukur semua selamat kan...thanks for yr doa semoga kita berdua berjaya hendaknya!
sity: thanks Auntie Sity!
Happy birthday Syasya!!
Mai, this is why I question, why are women called the "weaker sex"? Padahal, we go thru and SURVIVE so many things that men would never recover from.
Good luck to u and ur hubby on ur exams. Cayok!! Bleh punya!!
mai, baru sempat baca blog..
erm... good luck for ur exam..nanti pas exam kita celebrate besday syasya tauuu!
salute giler kat mai. baru 2 hari bersalin amek exam? oh my, i wonder how u managed to do that? dah la masa tgh study sarat mengandung aktif plak sana sini. u r very strong mai. tabik spring! toink toink! :)
ni kalau syasya dah besar baca entry ni entah cemana perasaan dia kan. u sacrifice way too much for ur angel mai, which is to me is incredible! but worth it kan? tapi kalau mai tanya zz, no way nak belajar balik. not to say my brain berkarat or whatsoever, tapi i am not interested. as simple as that. bcoz i believe in experiences rather than a sheet of paper. zz ada diploma je pun mai... org lain semua ada degree. tapi alhamdulillah, gaji zz sama taraf dgn org yg ada degree. :)
again, mai... i salute u! *hugs*
mai....memang satu dugaan utk kitakan ...dgn keje, hal anak lg, hal study lg...semua tu kita berjaya hadapinya...anne yakin anak2 kita akan hargai semua usaha kita...well all the best to mai..and jaga kesihatan yek...good luck..
lenny: thanks lenny!
zizie:zizie, takla terror pun mai ni zizie, sbb bila desperate cam tpaksa lalui itu semua, masa tu dah tak smpt pk, tp betullah zizie, mai pun dah takmo cont study coz nak tumpukan pd family n anak...cukupla...kalo mai grad ni mmg rasa terharu sgt...insyallah kalo ada rezki mai aderla...u pun bagus zizie, bos pun sayang...
anne: betul tu anne, good luck to us both..,
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